Thursday, November 11, 2010

Theme Thursday Relax

Beach Chairs by Laura Trevey

 re·lax   /rɪˈlæks/
–verb (used without object)
6. to become less tense, rigid, or firm.
7. to become less strict or severe; grow milder.
8. to reduce or stop work, effort, application, etc., esp. for the sake of rest or recreation.
9. to release oneself from inhibition, worry, tension, etc.

Man!  I am the last person you want to hear from regarding "relax" because I do not know how.  I have been a hyper, worried, skitzy, thinks too much, glass-is-half-empty person my entire life.  I have spent years and dollars and time seeking ways to relax, from physical therapy to yoga to psychological counseling to drugs to exercise to drinking and now, back to yoga/exercise.  Do I have a magic answer?  Hell no!

I have been a nail biter, teeth grinder, stomach churning mess whose primary saving grace is to constantly seek ways to help myself.  Otherwise, I'd be an alcoholic with a drug problem and no teeth. 

"Relax" you say?  I'll try.  Belly breathing, inversion poses, cardio vascular exercise, meditation are the preferred methods.  Of course, I like double gin martinis, an extra dose of Cymbalta, half a pack of cigarettes and a great big meal.  If I don't calm down after that, I'm just not gonna.

So there you have it.  Don't take advice from me as it will be all the wrong suggestions, liquor, pills, cigarettes, sex...did I leave that out?  Sex always relaxes you but you have to have it.  I'm uptight every night ...

"Honey!
  

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14 comments:

Brian Miller said...

hehe. i think hubby might get the point...smiles. nice pic!

Matty said...

You sound like my wife. And heaven help me if I say "relax" when she's upset about something. YIKES!

Marguerite said...

You crack me up! lol Seriously, cooking relaxes me. I know, weird! And being alone does, too. I find that it's the people around me who hype me up! Cheers!

Mmm said...

and is there anythign wrong wit that, well, assuming one has a spouse to have it with?!! :)

Well, you know CG, I so do know how to relax. Very good at that in fact...and no, not from sex per se (although that works) but hot cuppas, hot water bottles, you name it.

Ha.

thank you, btw, for your oh so precious comments on my blog recently. Really blessed me there. And , I LOVE the Little house books too. One of the best holidays I ever had was when we all went down the Laura Ingalls Wilder highway and saw most of the places mentioned in her books. Wonerful and beautiful.

LeiffyV said...

Very amusing, I have to admit it doesn't sound weird to me since I suffer from the same thing as you do. The only thing helping we relax is writing!

Thanks for sharing this, I am glad I took a moment to read it!

budh.aaah said...

I love it. u tickled my funny bone which I'd lost sometime back :)

mouse (aka kimy) said...

ha! it is said that recognition of the problem is the first step!

Karen Fayeth said...

Hmm, I think getting tense about the need to relax is quite a common loop...at least it is around my house....

nancy said...

absolutely hilarious debbie. who would have guessed?

Tom said...

it's what the dr. ordered!

Nancy said...

An alcoholic with a drug problem and no teeth - somehow this doesn't mesh with my picture of you. :-)

Sex is great but you have to have it, lol!

nimaruichi said...

:)

Grandmother said...

I think the sex answer is the best. What partner is going to say no to that?! Me, I'm living in Italy and learning from the experts!

Harnett-Hargrove said...

we are fellows, answering the phone is as relaxed as I get! -J